you hate;

the whole thing,
look at my life from the outside, and you'll think i have nothing to complain about. You know what, you're probably right, my life is pretty good, but i'm still human, and i still have problems, not matter what it looks like from where you're standing.

Well, Cody and I broke up, and if you read my last blog, that's a good thing. I was talking to Helen and she said she doesn't really get into relationships anymore. She likes the guys but doesn't date them unless she thinks they'll last because otherwise what's the point? She's totally right, its just painful otherwise, and you know what i figured? i don't like anyone, i just have guys who are my bestfriends, and i'm okay with that.

The thing is with Cody, everytime I do something wrong, Britney's always waiting for it. She'll wait, then tell me something horrible about him, make me feel crap. It's all because he hate's her. I hate having to pretend I'm on both sides, when it's totally clear that I'm on Cody's side. Sorry Britney.

Mikaela's birthday party this weekend :S okay, I'm going to force myself to have fun at this party, is that possible ? Oh well, atleast mother isn't letting me sleep over. :)

just the part called 'your life'
i hate this; seriously. I'm so sick of my shitty little private school, with strict teachers, backstabbing friends, totally f***ed up makeup and hair rules etc. God, I give up, I don't give a sh*t, I will find a way to leave. Mother wont let me go to a public school, so it's very tempting to try and get expelled. It wouldn't be very hard. Tonite is when i'm going to tell her that she has three options; 1. send me to a state school; 2. Send me overseas for a year; 3. Send me to live with my father in Spain.
I just want to get away from it all; to start again. I know that won't be easy but it will be a million times better than staying here.

What would you do ?
love&light;
oceane.